
It's not unusual for a Veteran to experience intense periods of stress and danger during their deployment. Skills like hyper-vigilance, secrecy, and being loud may have helped them to succeed and stay alive, but these same skills may not translate well to civilian life. And when your friend or family member returns home, these skills, along with feelings of intense emotion, may continue---it happens to thousands of Vets every day. These combat stress reactions are common, and they can affect friendships, a marriage, a job, and the health of everyone involved.
One veteran describes her feelings this way, "Coming home was a roller coaster of emotions and still a year and a half later I feel most comfortable when I am surrounded by those 12 men I served with no matter where we are or what we are doing something about it always feel comforting and right."
Her feelings of wanting to be around those she served with is common. While veterans need the support of other veterans, they need the understanding and patience of their friends and family as well. The following can help.
Normal Combat Stress Reactions
Your loved one may experience some or all of the following behavioral and emotional changes:
- Anger
- Difficulty concentrating
- Aggression
- Hyper-vigilance
- Detachment
- Exaggerated startle response (jumping at loud noises)
- Aggressive driving
- Trouble sleeping/restless sleeping
- Nightmares/flashbacks
- Withdrawal
Impact to Family and Friends
When your loved one engages in the above behavior, you and your friends and family members may respond by:
- Being afraid
- Keeping things secret
- Hiding bad news or stressful situations
- Assuming responsibilities your loved one would normally do
- No longer expecting your loved one to respond, show up, or be responsible
- Disconnecting from your loved one
Helping Your Loved One
For most Veterans, recovery from these issues will simply take time and understanding. If these combat stress reactions become a problem or if they begin to affect the lives of everyone involved, your loved one may be suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), depression, or a traumatic brain injury (TBI). These are serious conditions that can lead to other complications or be fatal.
Talk to your friend or family member about these invisible injuries. Let them know that these are normal war wounds, not signs of weakness. Tell them that you're concerned, and find out what you can do to help them cope or to make their transition easier. If they're reluctant to talk to you about their problems, encourage them to talk to fellow Veterans who may be going through the same readjustment processes or to seek outside help.
Helping Yourself
How to find help if you need it.
- Talk with other family and friends in the SupportYourVet.org Forum
- Find your nearest VA hospital by calling 877-222-VETS
- Homecoming Preparedness for Veterans and Families
- Check out the Vet Center Readjustment Services
- Find and contact a VFW Post or American Legion Post for Veteran support services near you
Featured Story
I remember a time when a family friend asked me how it felt to be a father of someone at war in Iraq. He then stated that he would be out of his mind with anxiety and worry....
by Chris RobertsAdded 07/11/2008
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